Marriage - The real deal
Marriage is another dying trend in our society. Instead of the traditional, get married, then have sex, and make a family it has become a jumbled up mess. Where one night stands are a common thing, and cohabitation is the newest trend. When the fact is this is actually detrimental to the family. However, not only all this disloyalty and unwillingness to commit is killing the marriage trend. It's the whole 'wedding day celebration' that has been blown out of proportion, making the beginning of marriage a nightmare.
Marriage used to be all about becoming a family, uniting yourselves together as a team and partnership for life and the hereafter. But due to advertising and needing to be seen as popular and rick the wedding day has become a great cause for debt. The average marriage in America today costs between $27,000-$38,000. Couples used to get married young, however, I don't see many young adults walking around with that much money easily accessible to them. So they have three options.
1. Savings - they can take all the savings they've earning since they were young and blow it on a one day celebration.
2. Parents - they can get the money from their parents or another family member, which can often be help over their head in the future.
3. Credit card debt - they can pay for it all with a credit card or take out loans.
None of the above are ideal situations for a couple starting out. Using up their savings for a single day is one of the worst decisions they could make. If they run into any unexpected medical expenses, auto expenses, school expenses or anything else, they won't be able to cover it anymore.
Second, getting money from the parents or another family member can be nice. There's not as much stress and often times they'll say you don't owe them anything. But a few years down the road if they get in a tight spot, it becomes very easy for them to hold it over your head that they payed for your wedding and they need your help. Or it could make family functions uncomfortable if you're not doing so great at paying them back if that was the arrangement. This adds stress to the family dynamic and you live with constant guild.
Third, debt is something we are constantly taught and told to avoid, but we still crave being on top and being seen as something we're not. It's not healthy for a young couple to start off their marriage with debt. 89% of divorces are over financial troubles. Don't start your marriage with an immense amount of financial stress at the start.
Now, not only has the wedding celebration been blown out of proportion, but it's all just a big show, it's not about the couple anymore, it's a party for everyone else. The purpose of a marriage is to unite two people together, not to say, "Look at us, we're so cool and know how to throw a party and have a good time." Marriages are falling apart because we are taking the focus away from the real purpose. Here is my favorite quote that defines the true meaning and purpose of marriage, the meaning that unites family and maintains a happy and dedicated family unit:
"There is no great or majestic music which constantly produces the harmony of a great love. The most perfect music is a welding of two voices into one spiritual solo. Marriage is the way provided by God for the fulfillment of the greatest of human needs, based upon mutual respect, maturity, selflessness, decency, commitment, and honesty. Happiness in marriage and parenthood can exceed a thousand times any other happiness." -James E. Faust
Sources:
file:///C:/Users/Owner/Downloads/Lauer%20&%20Lauer,%20Chapter%2008%20-%20Getting%20Married%20(1).pdf
file:///C:/Users/Owner/Downloads/Early%20Marriage%20Adjustments-1%20(1).pdf
Fundamentals of Family Finance, by E. Jeffrey Hill and Bryan L. Sudweeks
Marriage used to be all about becoming a family, uniting yourselves together as a team and partnership for life and the hereafter. But due to advertising and needing to be seen as popular and rick the wedding day has become a great cause for debt. The average marriage in America today costs between $27,000-$38,000. Couples used to get married young, however, I don't see many young adults walking around with that much money easily accessible to them. So they have three options.
1. Savings - they can take all the savings they've earning since they were young and blow it on a one day celebration.
2. Parents - they can get the money from their parents or another family member, which can often be help over their head in the future.
3. Credit card debt - they can pay for it all with a credit card or take out loans.
None of the above are ideal situations for a couple starting out. Using up their savings for a single day is one of the worst decisions they could make. If they run into any unexpected medical expenses, auto expenses, school expenses or anything else, they won't be able to cover it anymore.
Second, getting money from the parents or another family member can be nice. There's not as much stress and often times they'll say you don't owe them anything. But a few years down the road if they get in a tight spot, it becomes very easy for them to hold it over your head that they payed for your wedding and they need your help. Or it could make family functions uncomfortable if you're not doing so great at paying them back if that was the arrangement. This adds stress to the family dynamic and you live with constant guild.
Third, debt is something we are constantly taught and told to avoid, but we still crave being on top and being seen as something we're not. It's not healthy for a young couple to start off their marriage with debt. 89% of divorces are over financial troubles. Don't start your marriage with an immense amount of financial stress at the start.
Now, not only has the wedding celebration been blown out of proportion, but it's all just a big show, it's not about the couple anymore, it's a party for everyone else. The purpose of a marriage is to unite two people together, not to say, "Look at us, we're so cool and know how to throw a party and have a good time." Marriages are falling apart because we are taking the focus away from the real purpose. Here is my favorite quote that defines the true meaning and purpose of marriage, the meaning that unites family and maintains a happy and dedicated family unit:
"There is no great or majestic music which constantly produces the harmony of a great love. The most perfect music is a welding of two voices into one spiritual solo. Marriage is the way provided by God for the fulfillment of the greatest of human needs, based upon mutual respect, maturity, selflessness, decency, commitment, and honesty. Happiness in marriage and parenthood can exceed a thousand times any other happiness." -James E. Faust
Sources:
file:///C:/Users/Owner/Downloads/Lauer%20&%20Lauer,%20Chapter%2008%20-%20Getting%20Married%20(1).pdf
file:///C:/Users/Owner/Downloads/Early%20Marriage%20Adjustments-1%20(1).pdf
Fundamentals of Family Finance, by E. Jeffrey Hill and Bryan L. Sudweeks
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